slaverichard: A money slave owned by GoddessTierra (slaverichard) wrote,
slaverichard: A money slave owned by GoddessTierra
slaverichard

A Close Shave

The last few days have been rather disappointing for me.  I chose to act out again, having bought some clips, as well as shopping Goddess Tierra's wishlist, and sending her an amazon giftcard.  I even signed up to her membership site!  I pretty much wasted all of today watching clips on goddesstierra.com.  I came so close to sending another amazon giftcard tribute, but thankfully I managed to control myself.  At one point of particularly high arousal, something completely unforeseen and miraculous happened - I completely snapped out of my 'trance'. I guess my logical, 'left brain' took over and realised how stupid I was being.  I realised if I continued down that path, I'd return to the old days, where I was consumed and completely addicted to findom, spending every penny and more on Goddess Tierra, and wasted countless days, months and YEARS of my life sitting in front of a computer screen.

Since I started recovery, my life has been improving.  My finances are being repaired, my social life is better, and my confidence is improving too.  I really wouldn't want to jeopardise everything I have achieved so far.  I consider this little 'blip' on my road to recovery as entirely temporary.  Lets hope this is the last hurdle before I move forward to a much better life.
Tags: addiction, financial domination, findom
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